I’ve been saving draft versions of blog posts for months. It’s been a long time since I published anything and I don’t really know why.
Of course, there are always excuses: My work takes a lot of creative energy and I don’t have any left for my own blog. I don’t have time. Nobody is going to read it so why does it matter. It’s been too long since I last published and people will judge me. Covid.
Then, today I was having a conversation with someone I have a lot of respect and admiration for. She said something that made a lot of sense to me:
“We both need to learn to be more visible without feeling exposed.”
Separating my “self”
I find it relatively easy to write for work. The words pour out and I am able to assess whether the tone is right or the message is clear or if I am fulfilling the brief I’ve been given. I can distance myself from my writing and look at it with a more critical eye.
When I write for myself, I feel like every word carries a little piece of me onto the paper (or screen) and I can be viewed in every clumsy attempt at humour, typo or rule of three. I feel exposed.
For someone whose imposter syndrome enjoys the comfort that writing anonymously affords me, Medium has become quite a scary place to put down my thoughts. But those words today have convinced me that I have to put myself out there without fear (or at least ignoring the fear for now).
A personal promise
So now I am making myself a promise.
I am going to publish this, today (3rd February 2022) and I am going to work my way through my drafts in the coming days and weeks and publish anything that is even half legible.
I am also going to update my 5 year old profile picture.
It’s time to be visible!
